I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
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