Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
