This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
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