It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
