i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
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