none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
