I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
