BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
