Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
