HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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