its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
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