Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
