Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Randomize
