i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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