If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
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