I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
