I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
