Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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