can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
