Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
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