Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
