I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
