did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Randomize
