I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Betty ford says i'm here all night
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
