Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
