That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I need moral support for this bender
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
