discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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