The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
