I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
