i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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