Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
