i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... ๐ฏ๐๐๐
Do I even want to know?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. Thatโs all. I have no other memory.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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