Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
