I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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