the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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