It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
