Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
He shit in the fireplace
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize