just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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