Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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