Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
