I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
