I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
