I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
