that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
