In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Randomize
