im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
