this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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