i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize