Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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