Princesses don't give blow jobs
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
She's not a foreskin expert like you
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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