hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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